A guy chats his best friend:
“So I like somebody and she’s super cute! Everything about her.. Her cute looks and life-giving personality is something.. Ahhhh she’s amazing!! But will she like me back?? Parang she’s too out of my league eh. How do I even know if I’m ready to get into a relationship anyways??”
The best friend replies:
“Same.. same. Big same.”
And so ends that conversation.
The questions guy asked his best friend are perhaps one of the greatest struggles of millennials and generation z people today. “How do I even know if I’m ready to get into a relationship anyways?” It’s a tough one.
So, here are some questions that are worth asking yourself before you do:
1) What is my current state in life right now?
By state in life, are you a high school student? College? Working? What you answer to this question matters … A lot. Knowing and accepting what your current state in life is will help guide you to make a wise and prudent decision before entering into a relationship.
2) Am I financially stable or on the road to being financially stable?
Practically speaking, relationships cost. They mean responsibilities, especially if one of your relationship goals include discerning whether he or she will be with you for the long-term, until death you guys part. It’d be wise to be financially-capable.
3) Am I ready and capable of supporting a family?
This is a tough question to ask. Why think of family already? Think about it, though: ideally, how do good and life-giving relationships end? In marriage. That is the long-term and ideal end goal — we ought not to just get into a relationship just for the fun of it, but with an intended good and long-term goal in mind.
So, if your answer to this is a no, it might not be a good idea to get into one yet. Good things come to those who wait.
4) How am I, emotionally speaking?
This is very important, especially now in the context of the pandemic. Am I doing alright emotionally? Do I still see a glimmer of hope, despite everything that’s going on? Or do I feel down, lonely, and a little depressed? Ultimately, you have to ask …
5) Why am I going for a relationship anyways?
The answer to this question is super important. It’d be wise to really reflect on this because going back to question four, if your answer is “I feel down and lonely”, it might (just might!) be the case that the desire to get into a relationship is (unknowingly) a way of filling that void. Do I really want to love this person for who he/she is? Or I am just using him/her to fulfill that void in me?
Ultimately, it’s all about being prudent and wise. Relationships are fun, yes, but they also mean responsibility. Love and responsibility, as the title of the late Karol Wojtyla (later Pope John Paul II)’s book goes.
Always, always treat people for who they are: made in God’s image and likeness. That way, we can really give them the love they truly deserve.
The author of this article:
An accomplished young Chinese Filipino writer and media personality, Aaron S. Medina is associated with the Philippine Daily Inquirer, the Ateneo de Manila University Chinese Studies Program, the Philippine Association for Chinese Studies, and CHiNOY TV. He has a passion for truth, justice, and Pokémon, too! Follow him on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/aaron.joseph.s.medina/