Reclaiming My Chinese Heritage While I Still Can

I was born with a surname that doesn’t reflect my bloodline – a heritage, a legacy that I was supposed to carry with pride. Whenever someone asks me, “Where did your surname come from?” I hesitate. I usually struggle to explain that it’s not my real last name because it’s from a lineage I have no connection to. 

Growing up, I felt that disconnection deeply when most of my classmates were using their Chinese surnames – Sy, Lim, Chan, Ong, etc. – and those surnames came with unspoken certainty and belongingness. 

It was easy for them to identify where they came from and why they didn’t need to explain that they were part of the Chinese-Filipino community. Their surnames were already speaking for them. 

That became my insecurity – not because I wanted to flaunt my surname, but because I wanted to use a surname that reflected who I am. In search of clarity, I longed to find my roots to reclaim what was lost and disconnected. 

In my journey of self-discovery,  I began learning more about my history with Chinese Ancestry Research (CAR). With them, I discovered that a heritage once lost is not necessarily gone forever – some parts may still be reclaimed.

My story is not mine alone. It echoes through many Chinese-Filipinos, and Huárén 华人 everywhere, particularly those born and raised outside of  Greater China, whose surnames were erased, forgotten, and lost. And yet, despite the missing link, it’s not impossible to reconnect with our roots. 

 

Lost – Losing Our Identity Over Generations 

My heritage is a tale that started from the sea, where my ancestors’ migration brought their legacy to a new land.

Whenever I would ask my father about his grandparents, he would tell me stories about how they crossed the sea to the Philippines in the early 1900s, bringing only hope and dreams for a better future. Despite their aspirations, what they left behind was just as significant — their culture, their heritage, their identity, and their roots.

As immigrants, surviving in an unfamiliar place forced my ancestors to assimilate and adapt to the new social norms —  gradually wearing down the cultural identity they were born with, as a necessary strategy for survival.

My father recounted how his grandparents had to buy Filipino names  or “paper name” as Tua Di 大字 in order for them to obtain the right to stay, start a business or earn a living — sacrificing their real last name to get through day by day.  

Hearing this made me realize that my own surname — whether by birth or by circumstance — is also a story of resilience. It’s not just a name, but a mark of what my family endured: war, loss, reinvention, and survival.

My story mirrors the journey of many Chinoys (Chinese-Filipinos) whose ancestors immigrated to the Philippines — a testament to their perseverance and sacrifice in pursuit of a better life for future generations. They adapted their values, endured hardship, and, above all, embraced a new identity while carrying the legacy of the old.

ALSO READ: Binondo: History of Oldest Chinatown In The World

But the loss of cultural identity is not unique to Chinoys alone. Across the globe, countless other Huárén 華人 have experienced the gradual erosion of their roots through migration and resettlement.

One member of Chinese Ancestry Research shared a haunting example: in her family’s case, the erasure wasn’t solely caused by racial discrimination — though that certainly played a role. Her ancestor, who died in Australia, was laid to rest with no Chinese name and no mention of his ancestral hometown on the tombstone. Nothing to anchor her memory to where she came from.

Whether through assimilation, external pressures, or the social norms of the time, the outcome is heartbreakingly similar: the next generations are left staring at blank spaces in their history — struggling to retrace the steps that might lead them back to their roots.

What we carry inside our hearts is the hope to reconnect with our roots and a belief that rediscovery can transform the way we see ourselves.

Discovery — Encounter with Chinese Ancestry Research

What if the clues fade — erased by time like so many forgotten stories?

When I was still at a Chinese school, learning about our history — emperors, dynasties, and legends — felt too distant and customary. It wasn’t something I could relate to. But ever since the recent revelations about the history of my surname, gained from Chinese Ancestry Research, I realized how we are still connected to the past — how connected I still am to the lessons I had studied just for exams.

I’ve learned that our surnames can reveal where we came from and even trace our lineage back to ancient times. It’s indeed in my hands to change my destiny by being proactive in researching my history while it’s still within reach.

While in the pursuit of knowing my ancestry, I pondered: what if I had never taken the opportunity to learn about my ancestral history? What would happen to the existing clues years from now? Perhaps they would also fade — like how time erases the past — vanishing into the void.

 

Taking the Action to Know My Ancestors 

But before they vanish, I had the chance to discover more about the lineage where I came from when Nathan shared with me an article about my surname, Sy (施). I learned about the origins, symbolism, and historical legacy of the surname, tracing back thousands of years.

After reading the article, I saw myself 10 to 20 years from now:  a version of myself that wasn’t allowed to learn about my ancestors’ history. In this alternative timeline, I would probably have no stronger sense of identity.

I wouldn’t be able to see my ancestral hometown before it became an unfamiliar establishment, or perhaps I would not have the opportunity of meeting with long-lost relatives who could have shared stories about our ancestors.

But fortunately, that didn’t happen — and for that, I thank my ancestors for watching over me. After I sent Nathan a photo of my grandfather’s tombstone, he took it from there. The inscription held the key: it revealed that my grandfather came from Long Yuan Village in Fujian, China.

At this moment, time is of the essence — it made me think: what would happen if, years from now, my grandfather’s tombstone has lost its inscription to time — erasing the clues forever? I would never know my ancestral hometown, and it would deprive me of the chance to visit them in the future.

READ FULL STORY HERE: Why Chinese Names Matter: The Deep Meanings Behind Surnames & Given Names

Thankfully, since I now know where my ancestral hometown is, I have begun planning to go there as soon as I can, before everything goes into shambles. I remember what Nathan told me:

“Visit your ancestral hometown as soon as you can! You’ll never know what will happen. Someday, you might see your hometown developed into a shopping mall or a building complex. Take action now and do your part to continue your ancestor’s legacy.”

This made me realize: I don’t want to see my ancestor’s village forever erased from the map, memories buried deep in the ground, desperately calling to me where their voices will never reach me.

Even Nathan shared pictures of his ancestral hometown, where the homes look shattered and ruined. A lesson he gave me is to not let this moment slip away from my hands. I have to move now while I still have the chance to visit my hometown, which is still whole.

(Photo Courtesy: Nathan’s Ancestral Home in GānBǐng Village 杆柄村 by Nathan Co)

His advice led to the echoes that still ring inside my mind, urging me to move forward and take my destiny into my hands. Time is a privilege and I have to reclaim my identity while I still have the clues.

And to know where I came from is to breathe life into their memories before time silences them forever. 

 

Reclamation – Act Now to Reclaim What’s Yours

The moment I learned about my ancestors, I reflected on this question: “What happens when our roots are forgotten?”

If I hadn’t known my history, never taken action on learning my ancestry, I realized that there would always be a missing piece within me. I would keep questioning my identity, always searching for validation about my Chinese ancestry — perhaps even continue feeling insecure about not using my real surname.

Now, I know that my ancestry is something that can make me feel complete, and if I hadn’t looked for the answers, I would always be a disconnected part of a greater whole.

In this resolution, I am acting in the present and will always find a way to honor my family’s history. I could now visit my ancestral village before it changes, retrieve family documents before they are lost, and possibly meet living relatives in my ancestral hometown before the link is broken.

All of that became possible because I reclaimed what’s mine — what was waiting for me all along.

ALSO READ: Tracing Your Chinese Roots: Huaren Beginner’s Guide

Credits to: Tracing Your Chinese Roots: Huaren Beginner’s Guide (CHiNOY TV) 

 

Reclaim What Was Yours All Along

Just like my story, it can also happen to you. You can continue your family’s legacy by looking to the bright future ahead, because the answers might be around you, waiting to be discovered.  After all, our heritage is already ours — sometimes, we just need to reach out and claim it. 

Nathan even shared, “You can’t change the past. But you can honor it. Start the search. Join the conversation. Reclaim what was yours all along.”

Every effort can help you get closer to the answers you’ve been looking for. All it takes is the courage to traverse a journey where you could come back full circle in knowing where you came from  and begin shaping a future where you finally feel whole.

And before we end the article, try to think about this: 

Are you willing to take the action to get to know your ancestors?  

Because if you don’t reclaim your heritage… who will? 

Act now while you still can. 

 

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